Titus 3:3 NIV
At one time we too
were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and
pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.
When Was The Last Time You Got Into An Argument Or
Fight?
Not too long ago I was substitute teaching for a
middle school English teacher. Each
class had the same assignment. Read a
particular chapter from a novel originally written by a sixteen year old and
answer questions on a worksheet about the book.
Because I did not have anything to do but sit with the classes as they
worked, I decided to read the book myself.
The main character was a young teen that was part of a gang battling a
rival gang of boys. One gang was made up
of wealthy kids who seemingly had everything and the other gang was known as greasers
and was comprised of poor kids generally from broken and dysfunctional
homes. The book, which was made into a
movie, explored the themes of friendships and hatred, of loyalty and
disdain. As the book wound down to its
emotional conclusion, the central character, who was also the narrator
developed feelings of empathy for the members of the rival gang and began to
see a few of them as individuals with psychological pain and broken lives. A revelation of sorts came to the main
character after he and his older brother got into a bitter argument and each
wanted the middle brother to take his side.
It all was just too much and the middle brother fled the home. Finally, when all three were together, the
middle brother begged the other two to stop fighting. “We only have each other”, he cried. It was then that the three boys, who were
orphans living on their own in the home their parents had, grasped the terrible
truth about conflict. It tears apart
what should be kept together. We do have
each other and that is a great and wonderful gift to possess.
When was the last time you got into a fight or
argument with someone? Did it go
well? Are you glad the two of got upset
with each other? How do you feel after
you argue with someone? Are you glad you
got your point across? Did you feel
justified or even vindicated when it ended?
Do you tend to avoid arguments at all cost or are you the first to jump
in when others disagree? Is it important for you to make your case and
be heard? If you were to be asked, what
would you give as the reason for most fights?
Can they be avoided? Should they
be avoided?
There have been fights since the beginning of
time. Some have been rather one-sided as
in the murder of Abel by Cain. Certainly
the most famous and remembered were those between nations. But is seems pretty likely that more than a
few times Adam and Eve argued and may even have fought. David famously bickered with his wife Michal
and the great leaders of the church, Paul and Barnabas argued so contentiously
that they went their separate ways and stopped working together.
Saul, who was king, could not bear the popularity of
his young apprentice and tried to kill him.
Certainly we see arguments today rising to the level of murder and such
was the case for many in the Bible. Yet
generally, arguments and fights do not turn to physical violence but often
psychological scars are left and not everyone who gets into arguments “kiss and
make up”. Everywhere though arguments
are taking place. Most couples argue and
many children quarrel with their parents.
Families fight and so do co-workers.
The disciples got mad at each other a time or two and the patriarch of
both Jews and Muslims, Abraham, had to move away from his cousin Lot because
the two could not agree on how to work together. There are plenty of fights described in the
Bible and most of them went badly.
Many conflicts are spawned by the low self-esteem of
at least one person involved. That was
certainly the case of King Saul and his snowballing acrimony with young
David. Others flow out of one person or
the other and sometimes both used to always getting what he wants. How many arguments are due to the “spoiled
brat” syndrome? Rehoboam, the son of
Solomon set off a war simply because he was spoiled by his father and did not
want to give up some of his wealth by agreeing to lower the taxes that unfairly
burdened the people of Israel.
There is a third cause for arguments and
fights. It is the lack of self-awareness
found in many. There is an odd account
found in the Bible that illustrates it.
David famously began an affair with the wife of one of the most
decorated soldiers in his army. When she
became pregnant, David had her husband killed and then married Bathsheba. A courageous friend of David’s, a priest by
the name of Nathan, approached the King and told him a story that David assumed
was a description of real events. "There were two men in a certain town,
one rich and the other poor. The rich
man had a very large number of sheep and cattle, but the poor man had nothing
except one little ewe lamb he had bought. He raised it, and it grew up with him
and his children. It shared his food, drank from his cup and even slept in his
arms. It was like a daughter to him. "Now a traveler came to the rich man, but
the rich man refrained from taking one of his own sheep or cattle to prepare a
meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that
belonged to the poor man and prepared it for the one who had come to him."
(2 Samuel 12:1-4 NIV)
David, believing he was being told of an incident
that had happened, burned with rage at the rich man and wanted him
executed. Yet David did not realize that
this was simply Nathan’s way of pointing out the evil of David’s own
actions. Many times we get upset or
aggravated because we don’t take a hard and careful look at ourselves. We judge people without paying any attention
to our own faults and bad behavior. It
is just what Jesus described when He spoke of splinters and beams. "Why
do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention
to the plank in your own eye? How can
you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the
time there is a plank in your own eye?
You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you
will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. (Matthew
7:3-5 NIV) How many arguments would be
stopped dead in their tracks if this were taken seriously?
The bitter hatred Jonah the prophet had for the
Assyrian people culminated in a bizarre encounter he had with God on a
sweltering hillside overlooking the Assyrian capital. He wanted the Lord to demolish the Assyrians
then and there as he sat stewing over God’s mercy toward them. Jonah certainly had a case. The Assyrian armies were cruel and wrecked numerous
nations including Israel. There was no
love for the one true God among the people and it did not seem that it would
ever change. And yet God wanted to give
the Assyrians one more chance. But Nineveh has more than a hundred and
twenty thousand people who cannot tell their right hand from their left, and
many cattle as well. Should I not be concerned about that great city?" (Jonah
4:11 NIV) How easily so many write off
those who hurt their feelings, act rudely, have been dishonest or don’t take
their opinions seriously. It is Sin in
you which prods you to despise and judge others. Like a poison of the heart, Sin leads to criticism
and condemnation. God always has one
more reason to patiently wait for good to come out of any person you see. When you get angry or impatient with someone,
it is because of sin in you, not the imperfections in the one you dislike.
How many Christian people have stopped believing in
the Cross of Christ? We are not talking
about the World that has no love for Christ or faith in Him. We are saying that there are great numbers of
Christian people who no longer believe in what Christ does through the
Cross! By dying, the Lord completely
remakes any person who trusts Him for salvation. Not a part of that soul will
be left imperfect. Yet even Christian
people criticize Christ’s “work in progress”.
Imagine the great artist Rembrandt having to watch as passersby sneer at
the unfinished painting he has displayed in the window of his studio. They see colors splashed upon it, brush
strokes and empty blotches of canvas and despise what is there. How wicked and foolish of them to doubt the
skill of the great master as he works on his latest creation! As much as the Christian community dislikes
the term evolution because of how Charles Darwin and his followers have
corrupted it, evolution is occurring all about us under the loving hand of our
Savior. He is taking broken and corrupted
and damaged souls and remaking them into perfect and holy vessels bearing the
Spirit of God within them. How can we
ever despise or grow frustrated with those Christ has died to save? Will our Lord be happy with us if we fail to
acknowledge that each person we meet is an evolving masterpiece of His? Will He bless us if we criticize His perfect
work?
How happy would our Lord be if we would see each
person just as He does; as those Christ will eventually make perfect. Never doubt the ability of our Lord to turn
even the worst of sinners into the most holy of saints. Your criticism, disdain and anger; your
avoidance and disregard of any of His people is a reflection not of your
insight into human nature but rather a sign of your ignorance of just how
powerful God’s Cross is to make all things new and perfect. It is the old way of thinking to criticize
and have an attitude of disdain for those Christ died to save. The evolution of the soul will take place
and it is blasphemy to despise God’s work by looking down upon those He died to
save. Remember this admonition and
promise of God! So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we
once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a
new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! (2 Corinthians 5:16-17
NIV) When you look at someone who
irritates you or frustrates you or seems less good than you, remember that your
only responsibility is to gaze with wonder at how marvelously God will make
perfect those He died to save and in prayer thank Him for making “all things
new”.
