Suicide—Intervention

1 Kings 16:18 NIV

When Zimri saw that the city was taken, he went into the citadel of the royal palace and set the palace on fire around him. So he died,

How Can You Help The Suicidal?

The after the election I was teaching in a middle school class and as the students filed into the room a number of them were complaining about the results and several were saying that they were going to move to other countries.  Perhaps they were planning on going with Barbra Streisand or Miley Cyrus.  A few of them, who had never before had met me but knew I was their substitute teacher for the day, asked me who go my vote.  They were too young to worry about whether or not it was proper to ask me and I thought it was funny to be pressed for an answer.  I just laughed and turned away but as I thought more about the moment, I should have told them that I voted for hope, I voted for optimism, I voted for life.  I did not vote because I was afraid of the worst, I voted because I believed that my vote would help our country and even our world.  I did not vote for dread or for gloom or for fear.  I voted for promise.  Not everyone feels that such things exist or can even come their way.  There are many who have no hope and believe there is no good in life…not today…not tomorrow…and not ever.

There is so much hopelessness in our country, it is astounding.  Last year suicide was the tenth leading cause of death in the U.S.  Nearly 43,000 Americans killed themselves last year and what is even more painful to realize, there are twenty-five attempted suicides for every person who actually commits suicide.  Another way to put it: there are 117 suicides every day in the U.S. and nearly 13 suicides for every 100,000 people.  Men are 3.5 times more likely to commit suicide than women and older people are much more likely to kill themselves than are young people.

What do we do about the massive numbers of people who feel hopeless and broken by life?  How should we respond when we realize a friend or neighbor or co-worker feels too miserable to continue living?  At the risk of giving simplistic answers to complicated and terrifying questions, it would be good for us at least to examine the only example we find in the Bible of someone on the verge of suicide who changes his mind at the last second.  Tucked away in the book of Acts is a most enlightening account of how two missionaries responded to the despair of someone who was ready to kill himself.

As Paul and Silas sang and worshipped in their jail cell in the Macedonian city of Philippi, an earthquake shook the jail and miraculously the prison doors flew open and the chains on each of the prisoners fell off them.  The jailor woke up immediately and saw the prison doors wide open and knowing what would come of him if the prisoners had all escaped on his watch pulled out his sword to kill himself.  Such hopelessness is a key component to suicide.  This jailor was much like millions of others who have looked at what they face and decided they could not bear living any longer.  It does not matter how true the assessment is; they may be completely wrong about how bad it is.  What matters is that the person ready to commit suicide thinks all is hopeless.  Paul the Apostle, one of the prisoners in the jail immediately cried out to the jailer, "Don't harm yourself! (Acts 16:28 NIV)  Literally, he shouts to the jailer, “May you not commit evil.”  When dealing with someone suicidal, it takes a clear and unequivocal voice from a person who cares; this is wrong what you are thinking of doing.  There can be no wavering on this.  If you want to stop a suicide, you must forcefully insist that it is evil, that it is wrong to kill yourself.  Do not leave even a crack open to the possibility that suicide is an answer to the problems faced.  Paul shouted because he did not want there to be any doubt in the jailor’s mind that killing himself was evil.  Of course the jailer could have still fallen on the sword but it would not be because he thought Paul approved.  If you want to help someone who is suicidal, you must insist that killing yourself is not an option and always wrong.

In the instant when Paul intervened he said something else that is critical to preventing suicides.  He cried out, “We are all here!" (Acts 16:28 NIV)  There was in this immediate reaction a burst of reassurance that it was not as bad as the jailer thought.  This is always the way to help someone who has lost all hope and wants to end life.  There is in every instance, more to consider, a reason for holding out and not committing suicide.  Yes it may be bad, it may in fact be terrible what is faced but regardless of how bleak it may seem now, there is someone who needs you someone whose life will suffer if you are not there.  It may not be as easy as it was for Paul who simply had to remind the jailer that none of the prisoners had fled the prison.  Sometimes you might have to pull from a deep pocket to find some reason for hope but you can count on the Holy Spirit to help you.  Perhaps it is the family that is still there who loves you or the possibility of recovery or the encouragement that others can gain from the courage you show.  There is always a reason to live because in every situation one’s life matters and great good will come of it if given a chance.

Immediately the jailer responded to the hope Paul offered and he asked what he needed to do to be saved.  The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas.  He then brought them out and asked, "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?" (Acts 16:29-30 NIV)  Without hesitating, the two prisoners told him, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved — you and your household." (Acts 16:31 NIV)  Too many Christians think of the Gospel as a message or a new approach to life.  It is far more than that.  It is the power of God to change a life completely.  To believe in the Lord Jesus is the entry way in which the Lord comes into the personality and rebuilds it.  The sin that has wrecked so much within begins to be taken from it so that memories and damaged emotions and broken dreams can be worked out by God and replaced with hope and promise and a fresh start.  The root cause of every suicide is Sin, whether it is brought on by the sin we have committed or the sin that has been committed against us or the physical damage caused by sin.  It is always the Sin that must first be addressed when the immediate threat of suicide is pushed back.  By joining with Jesus Christ in faith, there is no limit to how much healing God can do in the broken and aching personality.

When Paul told the jailer that he and his family would be saved if they believed in the Lord Jesus, it was not a quick fix panacea but rather what each person in his home needed to be made right.  The blood of Jesus Christ is a healing balm that goes deep into the heart of those who receive it and it works into every place of hurt and sorrow and fear and despair and makes life come fully alive at each point.  Paul did not call for the jailer to become Christian; he called for him to be saved.  What every person considering suicide needs is not a new religion but a new life that brings salvation.  The Cross of Christ puts peace and hope and even love into the human heart.   To put it another way, it makes the humanity of the person right.  We know this is the case with the jailer because of what happened next.  He never would have reacted as he did if the Cross of Christ had not worked its way in him and made him new in observable and hidden ways.

When our Lord takes hold of the one who is broken and hopeless, a miraculous transformation occurs that manifests itself in a dramatic way.  We see it demonstrated by the jailer.  Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all the others in his house.  At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his family were baptized.  The jailer brought them into his house and set a meal before them; he was filled with joy because he had come to believe in God — he and his whole family. (Acts 16:32-34 NIV)  Suicide is the cocooning of the soul so that it becomes withdrawn and self-absorbed and with nothing to lean upon but its own sorrow and brokenness its only way out is death.  All it can find within is sin and the damage caused by sin and in despair it finds nothing but self-annihilation as a solution to its pain.  When healing begins to take place, the soul looks outward and finds a whole world to love and embrace.  The jailer in this case saw Paul and Silas and the wounds they had and so he washed them and bandaged them and even that wasn’t enough to fill his longing to love and bring comfort and so he brought them to his house and made dinner for them.  Eventually, if the despair of a suicidal heart is to be taken away, the movement must shift to an outward extension brought on by love.  The jailer was drawn to the pain his new friends had and did what he could to take away their pain.  This was not a small deed he performed; it was almost supernatural in scope.  No jailer who wants to survive a Roman inquiry and court would take prisoners home and feed them.  Yet his love now could not be bound by the risk he felt expressing it because he no longer was absorbed with his own problems but now free to love the world God had given him

There are two verses worth memorizing and claiming as promises for all those who are broken by despair.  The first is Matthew 11: 28. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (NIV)  Never forget that Christ really does bring rest and comfort to those who come to Him.  The second is Psalm 33: 20.  We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. (NIV)  We do not come to those who are hopeless and wanting to destroy themselves with empty hands and feeble alternatives.  We come with a Savior who is strong and able to save.  We come with hope that is not just trite verbiage but real hope that makes life good and filled with joy.  We come with God, our help and shield...the help and shield of every single hurting person we know.