Obedience—The Great Uncovering Step 2

Genesis 28:16 NIV

When Jacob awoke from his sleep, he thought, "Surely the Lord is in this place, and I was not aware of it."

Are You Aware Of God’s Work In You?

Perhaps the most odd of all my actions in college was when I got involved in a “love triangle”.  Now I am sure that the girl in the triangle did not think of herself as being in a love triangle.  She was just having a good time going out with different guys.  My two friends though who liked her and who wanted her to choose between them felt very much like they were in a love triangle; or at least in a very attracted to this girl triangle.  For several weeks each of these two guys pined to me about his affections for her and how he could not tell if she liked him or  was just pulling him along to feed her ego.  I liked these friends and didn’t want either one hurt and so finally when I heard the girl was going out with a third guy at our school, I decided we should do something about this.  A group of us guys snatched her one day, brought her to the school fountain at the front of the campus and tossed her in it.  Now some would say this was a very mean thing to do and although the girl was laughing and mad all at the same time when she got out of the fountain and perhaps in some strange way liked all the male attention she received that day, I was doing something that had to break some rule.  Even though I never read a single regulation in the school handbook prohibiting guys from throwing girls in the fountain, I cannot say that what we did was “right”…funny perhaps but not right.  What struck me in this was that it probably revealed more about me in organizing this prank than it did about Ella who we all thought deserved to be “baptized” in the fountain.  The question is, what did this rebellious and somewhat mean spirited act reveal about me?

We are unconscious beings who carry below the surface a vast assortment of memories, ideas, convictions and desires.  Who we think we are and what we decide about ourselves isn’t necessarily the complete picture and perhaps not even a true picture of us!  There is much to us that we don’t grasp…some we recognize but try to keep from others and a lot that is hidden from us of which a little, unbeknownst to us, has trickled out where it is observed by friends family members and even strangers.  The question is not whether or not we have a significant unconscious world within; it is what shall we do about that unconscious world and will we let it determine key aspects of our lives.

The Bible provides us with rich insight into our inner world and it is of great value to study the people who are described in it.  One of the most important players in the Old Testament is David, the eventual king of Israel whom some would call the greatest of all the Hebrew kings.  David was courageous, intelligent, creative, godly and passionate.  But he also was lusty, narcissistic, bull-headed and ambitious.  He was a wild tangle of conflicted personality traits that God worked through to establish a culture of faith among the Hebrew people and make into a “man after his own heart”. (See 1 Samuel 13: 14)  David knew there was much below the surface of his personality that he didn’t understand and he invited the Lord to probe it.  Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24 NIV)

There is a powerful and critical way the Lord reveals our hearts to us and it is astounding how effective it is.  The law of God not only defines holy behavior but it also uncovers layers of buried material that unconsciously drive many of our actions.  The Sermon on the Mount is a surprisingly effective way God reveals to us our hearts and the hidden wounded parts of our soul.  Consider just the directive to forgive.  For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (Matthew 6:14-15 NIV)  It is amazing how difficult it is for us to do this.  In fact, it could be argued that it is nearly impossible for many.

The painful description of David’s relationship with his first wife Michal illustrates just how illuminating the law of forgiveness can be.  David was the golden boy of his time, the conquering war hero who could do no wrong.  Yet it is likely that deep resentments that were developed in childhood haunted him.  His father saw so little in David that when the great prophet Samuel came to their town and called for everyone there to meet him for a sacrificial feast, the boy’s dad never bothered to call his youngest son back to the house.  He left David out in the fields tending sheep while every other child of Jesse was at the party.   To get a perspective on this, suppose Michael Jordan or Bill Gates were to come to your neighborhood and everyone on your block was invited to meet him at one of the homes down the street from you.  You had eight sons but brought only seven of them to the meet and greet.  How would it have felt to have been the only child not asked to come?  Later, we see what this mindset of the father did to David’s siblings.  When the older brothers went off to war to fight the Philistines and David’s father sent David to the front lines to bring food to his brothers, the oldest brother had a bitter reaction to David’s natural curiosity about the taunts of the giant Goliath and the way the soldiers planned on responding to Goliath’s challenge to fight him.  When Eliab, David's oldest brother, heard him speaking with the men, he burned with anger at him and asked, "Why have you come down here? And with whom did you leave those few sheep in the desert? I know how conceited you are and how wicked your heart is; you came down only to watch the battle." (1 Samuel 17:28 NIV)

Of course, we know that David not only ended up watching the battle but played the most important part in the Israelites winning the fight.  As a result of this bravery and other successful accomplishments in war, David was made a high ranking general in Saul’s army.  His popularity exploded and he was revered by the Israelites.  In fact he was more beloved than the king himself.  This infuriated King Saul and his jealousy inflamed his hatred of David.  The king concocted a plan to have David killed.  He told the boy that if he could somehow kill one hundred Philistines, he would give his daughter Michal in marriage.  Michal was in love with David and it would seem the feelings were mutual for David agreed to the bridal price.  David successfully killed one hundred Philistines and won Michal as his bride but their marital bliss did not last long.  Saul’s hatred of David grew so bitter that it became clear soon Saul would kill him if he did not immediately go into hiding. His wife Michal helped in his escape despite the risk she took enraging her father.  She knew it was possible that he would kill her for the part she played in David’s getaway.  But her love for David was too great for her to worry about her own life.  She had to help David save his.

What followed is tragic. The timeline isn’t clear but this marriage of infatuation and sacrificial love fell apart.  Abigail quickly got on a donkey and, attended by her five maids, went with David's messengers and became his wife.  David had also married Ahinoam of Jezreel, and they both were his wives.  But Saul had given his daughter Michal, David's wife, to Paltiel son of Laish, who was from Gallim. (1 Samuel 25:42-44 NIV)  Did first Saul force Michal to abandon her husband and marry someone he handpicked to replace him or did David first marry Ahinoam and Abigail and as a consequence Michal abandon her marriage to David and marry Paltiel upon her father’s direction?  We don’t know.  Probably Michal was the first one to remarry based upon Saul’s fury with David and Michal’s fear of her father.  David now had been rejected by the two most important men in his life, his father and the king who had taken him under his wing.  Michal may have been a mere pawn in her father’s hand but her rejection of David clearly stung David and his bitterness over her betrayal worked like dry rot in his soul.  He never forgave her.  One might argue that he couldn’t.   He was still the little boy whose father did not think he was good enough to warrant attendance at the party.

Ten years passed.  David had now added at least five more wives and perhaps more, fought a bitter war with Saul’s son and Michal’s brother Ish-Bosheth to gain control of all of Israel and no longer had King Saul to fear due to his death six years before.  Ish-Bosheth’s general Abner had become incensed with Ish-Bosheth and so decided to form an alliance with David and pave the way for David to be king over all Israel.  David was more than happy to make this agreement but first he had a requirement if he was to make peace with Abner and his army.  The general had to bring Michal back to David so that he could force her to be his wife again.  For perhaps ten years Michal had been with her new husband and he loved her deeply.  She was his only wife…he was her only husband.  David on the other hand had at least seven wives and many more he would take later.  What sort of bitterness of soul could lead to such a cold hearted, spiteful demand?  It was an ugly scene.  David told Abner and King Ish-Bosheth, "I will make an agreement with you. But I demand one thing of you: Do not come into my presence unless you bring Michal daughter of Saul when you come to see me." Then David sent messengers to Ish-Bosheth son of Saul, demanding, "Give me my wife Michal, whom I betrothed to myself for the price of a hundred Philistine foreskins."   So Ish-Bosheth gave orders and had her taken away from her husband Paltiel son of Laish.  Her husband, however, went with her, weeping behind her all the way to Bahurim. Then Abner said to him, "Go back home!" So he went back.  (2 Samuel 3:13-16 NIV)

Consider an imaginary conversation taking place between David and Jesus, one much like what happened between Christ and the rich young ruler.  David asks Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life and Jesus tells him as he tells us all in the Sermon on the Mount to forgive, “Forgive Michal for marrying Paltiel and come follow me.”  David replies, “I can’t; it’s too much to ask, to demand I forgive her!”  Now, why couldn’t he forgive Michal for remarrying?  Why did he make her return to him?  He no longer loved her.  She didn’t love him anymore it seems.  Why couldn’t David just forgive Michal and move on in his life and let her move on too?  What drove his determination to ruin Michal’s life and Michal’s husband’s life even though it is a fundamental principle of God’s Kingdom to forgive those who hurt us?  Perhaps, it was because David always had to prove he was the biggest man in the room, always had to be the conqueror, always needed to have the prize in his hand, always needed to be respected and appreciated.  He could never let anyone get the best of him, never be disrespected. He had a deep seated need to prove his worth, to be someone!  Why might that be?  Perhaps, his bitter disdain for Michal and her needs and his unwillingness to forgive her was rooted in something deep and ugly…perhaps it had to do with his battle to prove his worth to his dad.  Maybe, there was a wound in David’s soul that had never healed and when someone he cared about deeply reminded him of the rejection he experienced when he was a child, he could not let go of the hurt it uncovered.

What if though, everything went in a different direction and the rich young ruler did give up his wealth and follow Jesus and David did forgive Michal for marrying someone else?  Is it possible that in doing the command of God, by forgiving Michal, David might have been freed by God of his need to prove himself, freed of his neurotic need to live up to the expectations of his father?  We cannot say what might have been but we do know this.  The commands of God are not intended to take apart the joy we have in being independent and free.  God’s demands are based in love and if we obey Him, there is power in God to make us more free than we ever thought possible.  Consider the promise found in Malachi made to those who take God seriously enough to do as He commands; who believe that in all His ways He is good, even when He tells us to do something that we feel is too hard to do.  But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall. (Malachi 4:2 NIV)